the ghost with the most [entries|friends|calendar] livingatallcost MEMOIRS OF AN ILLITERATE PENPAL [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Production [Wednesday May 27th, 2009 at 2:16pm] [ music | Max Richter - Waltz With Bachir OST ] Sending mako to press today as well as finishing up some tasks I've been putting off. After waking up I realized that the soundtrack for the animated film "Waltz With Bachir" could possibly be available on the web. The soundtrack is composed by one of my favorite composers, Max Richter. So I was delighted that it was easily available after a short search. I really love some of the new approaches and I can't wait to connect the soundtrack with the film which looks stunning. Please take the time to check out the trailer. Love always Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

summer [Saturday May 9th, 2009 at 2:38pm] [ music | Kaospilot ] When Spring semester is over, and summer is beginning, I now feel like a year is ending and a fresh new year is beginning. I can't believe it has already been a year since everything changed. I've escaped from my routine of procrastination and anxiety and I'm hoping I don't dig myself an even deeper hole to fall into. But from how things have gone on the first day of my year/summer, I'm optimistic I will enjoy the time I spend however I choose to spend it. I'm starting to compile a list of projects that need to be completed as well as started. 1. The Mako Test Presses have arrived and sound great. I'll be sending United the rest of the money so that we can get those in as soon as possible. There will be 300 black and 100 opaque white. In addition to pressing the 7", I also need to finish designing the inside of the record so I can send it off to imprint and complete the entire record. I'm excited to see my design applied to something I've wanted to become a reality for quite some time. 2. I need to get the Komarov full length moving at a faster speed so it can be released this summer before a tour that may or may not happen. The Komarov camp has also been writing multiple new songs for possible split releases in the future. I need to organize the record label and figure out how much money we have available for this vinyl release. 3. The house I have been living in the last two years desperately needs to be properly cleaned and improved. I plan to finish projects I started over a year ago like painting my bathrooms and kitchen as well as starting new projects like organizing a workspace and painting the outside of my house. 4. My bike needs to be worked on so that I can properly cruise Edmond and Oklahoma City without worrying about my bike falling apart. 5. Start my sin journal for the summer of sin. More on this at a later date. 6. Expose myself to as much creative output as possible. I will now have time to watch movies and throw myself into music that I have somehow been missing out on. There are plenty of other things I need to be spending my time doing, but this is an immediate list of things on my mind. This morning I took the first step into step #6 and I reviewed the old blogspots that I have grown fond of for adding to my musical palette. A band called The Eastern Wave, formerly En Masse, have released a record that I am growing quite fond of. It's called "All covet, all lose" and the mastermind behind it just so happens to be Jake Brown of Twothirtyeight, Decahedron and Moments in Grace. Definitely check that record out if you have the time. I also received a mindfuck this morning when I realized that a new Kaospilot record had been released without my even knowing it. I'm stoked I discovered this information because so far it is an excellent record that even improves upon their previous catalog. I'll leave you with probably the greatest beginning to a record review as a run on sentence ever. "if you're anything like me you're really good at playing basketball and jerking off in a stand up shower stall, thats the best when you jerk off to your ex girlfriend, because its amazing to still fuck her even though she fucking hates your guts now" 1 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

I'm new to this. [Tuesday August 12th, 2008 at 4:57pm] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Mouth of the Architect - Sleepwalk Powder ] This promise you made is hollow is cold. Leaving a trail of soft ridicule. I sleep with women i don't deserve. Wretched, unstable, vulnerable. Void in compassion / premonitory Loving another is more difficult. Stealing and cheating and being a mess. Child in nature: so trapped. After the first sentence it seems clear that the following statements are an inward reflection. It could also be translated to a premonition because those are the feelings that will evolve into a more sincere action. Although, I don't pity myself or feel like these words reflect me or my personality, I feel these words inside of me because my mind has created them and attached them to circumstances within my life. These feeling make me feel trapped but my mind is put to ease when I realize I'm a child of nature and instead of defying these thoughts, I should look for an opportunity to resolved them through positive action. I'm new to this and I don't know how to feel differently. So I guess I'm not ashamed of the way I feel anymore. I yearn for affection and thats nothing to feel bad about because of the way I approach my needs. The funny thing is no needs have been met and that affection isn't realized. I'm just afraid of what waits for me. Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

the way things are [Sunday July 27th, 2008 at 2:28am] [ mood | awake ] [ music | emilie simon ] Ever since the school year ended and summer began, friends have gone away and come back but not a lot has been active within my life. I’ve wished some would come back, but I can’t turn things around. So I’ll wait. However, Eli and I managed to finally make it to Baton Rouge to stay with Sarah and Rosie and have a good time with old friends. For some reason I was expecting the trip to help pull me out of the convenience and anti-social behavior I've developed ever since my separation. Surprisingly, it actually did and I've felt better about being outside of my house and living a life that I can hardly even remember. In addition, I was able to experience one of my favorite reoccurring feelings which is to see friends that I've made while touring with Destroyer. I amazingly managed not to make a fool out of myself as a result of drunken adventures. I'm pretty sure I didn't anyways. Baton Rouge is a city I've always been stoked to be in and I hope I manage to make it back there in the near future. It's possible I might be visiting while touring with Komarov in October. I recently returned from touring with Mako in Texas with L'antietam. It was probably one of my better experiences while being out on the road without even being in the band. Traveling with your best friends and watching skramz every night is what I wish I could be doing everyday. I visited some killer vegan and vegetarian restaurants, ruled some pools, and threw some beerzzzzzzz.. Komarov should be having these trips within the near future. I’m almost waiting for things to get back to normal. But I know that’s not what I want. Some have to settle. Not me. 1 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

...so i use my fists [Friday June 20th, 2008 at 1:28am] [ mood | calm ] [ music | ceremony ] I've been trying to live a sober life after completing 100 days of drinking marked by my separation. I went to see ceremony tonight. It's been a long while since I've enjoyed myself so much. I told myself I would get out and see the people I care about after things changed. It's proving to be more difficult then I imagined. Looking for answers, not seeing shit. 1 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

summer punx [Wednesday May 28th, 2008 at 6:19pm] [ music | 1000 Travels Of Jawaharlal ] Schools out and the time has come for bike rides, snow conez, and PIZZA. Say yes to pizza and no to drugs. 7 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

philosophucked [Saturday January 19th, 2008 at 12:26am] [ mood | numb ] [ music | Old Man Gloom ] I've let my lack of potential and growing insecurities manifest into a burden I've put on the one person I care for. i feel like this most of the time. 2 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

It's Finally Happened! [Thursday February 1st, 2007 at 12:32am] [ music | GIANT ] View DAD HQ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm finally moving out with Hillary. View our dream come true. James gets a pink room. Which makes our house the nicest punk rock house around. Leave Christ at the door. Love, Jamie 4 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

Yearning [Tuesday November 21st, 2006 at 11:13am] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Premonitions of war ] Today is the day livejournal is revived. Yesterday double D signed a contract with goodfellow recordings. It makes me really excited about the future but it also causes me to actually sit down and think about what I want in my life. It's too bad I don't know wha the answer is. Then I came accross these pictures and remembered 5 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

raining blood [Tuesday June 6th, 2006 at 12:06am] [ mood | devious ] [ music | SLAYER ] 666! Time for some Slayer METAL!!!!!!! 2 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

Adam eats everything [Saturday March 4th, 2006 at 11:35pm] Cal, I'm going to beat the shit out of you. 1 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

Mother Fucker [Thursday January 19th, 2006 at 12:17am] [ mood | angry ] [ music | yann tiersen ] My car just got broken into. It's the first time this has happened to me. The only thing they took was my cd player which connected into the tape player through an adapter and Destroyer Destroyer's merch box which only contained exitium cds, robinson cds, see you next tuesday cds and some christmas lights. I'm super glad i took out all of my cds, Hillary's ipod, and the money box for destroyer just prior to the incident. I guess i should be happy nothing important was stolen but i feel so angry and violated. Shitty. 6 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

[Saturday January 7th, 2006 at 9:20pm] [ music | your enemies friends ] So i have pink eye in both of my eyes. I'm pretty sure it's dumb. It makes my vision blurry and i can't be around anyone. I've been sitting in my room for two days playing we <3 katamari. But atleast I didn't get my eye poked out like Dallas did in Baton Rouge. What a bummer that would have been. 6 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

every day is a struggle every day is a gift [Saturday December 3rd, 2005 at 1:49am] Things are good. Just finished recording the someplace to hide portion for the upcoming split with us and damezumari. We have to go back in sometime in December to mix and fix everything. I'm super excited about this release. I just found out Hillary is going to be able to go on the Destroyer Destroyer winter tour. That means more people will buy our stuff from the cute merch girl. I have an all state orchestra competition tomorrow morning and i haven't practiced. I'm such a lazy cellist. Sad really. I'm stressed about college even though i haven't done anything to further myself along and cause the stress. I don't know what i want to do, where i want to go, if my plans are going to work out, if hillary will live with me. nothing. I almost feel bad for not going out of state. But I know i would probably be happier here until i know what i want to do. Tough call. Today is officially Timothy Ryan Dowd's birth day. Happy birthday Tim. I'm glad I've known you for so long and we've had so many good times together. You are the truest friend i have ever had. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 2 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

When i get pissed, you get fist [Tuesday November 15th, 2005 at 11:17pm] [ mood | cold ] [ music | beneath the massacre ] So I had some pretty good times this weekend. A kid complained to his mother that I violated his genitals. Who would complain about that? But it was ok because then this happened: Cal and I definitely met our fisting quota for the day. 6 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

I'm reminded of a kid who used to stomp bugs [Wednesday October 26th, 2005 at 7:32pm] [ music | fing fang foom ] Friday: HALLOWEEN BLOOD BATH at the Conservatory Saturday: My birthday celebration. Sunday: Destroyer Destroyer show with The Jonbenet at the 114. This is how excited I am about this weekend... 2 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

cal is drunk [Sunday October 23rd, 2005 at 2:11am] Loss shall be my cal,james,adam, and tim. 3 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

[Sunday September 25th, 2005 at 6:25pm] I went with Hillary to her grandparents' house today. I'm glad she gave me the opportunity to understand her more. I'm thankful her grandfather helped her feel like she isn't alone. Watching her perform spice girls dances with katie as a child made me realize how much I love that girl. My girlfriend is a spice girl 2 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

[Thursday August 25th, 2005 at 9:47pm] [ music | the appleseed cast ] Went to the Appleseed Cast last night. I'm super excited about the new material they played. I like it better than two conversations. It felt more like low level owl. I've been super busy lately. I'm moving into a new house so everyday after school I immediately load up my van with boxes and go back and forth for 3 and a half hours until I have to go to cross country and run for and hour and a half. Then, if i'm lucky, I go see Hillary until I have to go home. This is the longest i have been away from Hillary in a while.I'm not worried though. I don't have cross country tomorrow and I'll be moved into my new house on Monday. I haven't taken any new pictures with my digital camera that are worth showing except for the party pics. But that is for another day. Until then... CUDDLEMONSTER! 2 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

Locust Reign [Tuesday August 9th, 2005 at 4:04am] [ music | converge ] It's just a picture. Geeze. Don't worry. Corey and Hillary know how to rock. Everyone loves a shredder. 1 people died|Exit 29 collapsed as I drove by

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